Excerpted from: The Courage to Be Yourself by Sue Patton Thoele

Accepting that each lesson encountered presents an opportunity to move a step closer to wholeness and be a smidgen better at expressing our real selves helps us embrace rather than resist them. God must have a sense of humor because life-lessons are typically presented by annoying people who grate on our nerves. Of course, they may set our teeth on edge because they come toting invitations to yet another life-lesson party. Lesson-bearers who activate our fears, stir up our insecurities, and frustrate the bejeebers out of us are, in fact, our greatest teachers.

As I’ve indicated one of my major life-lessons is self-love. So, naturally, I’ve drawn people into my own life who cannot or will not see me as loving no matter how hard I try to be the Perfect All-Loving Person. Obviously I have a ways to go in learning this particular lesson completely since a dear friend recently said, “I can hardly wait until you can stomp your little Mary Janes and say, ‘I don’t care what anyone else thinks, I love me!!!’”

Maybe I’ll learn self-love fully in this lifetime, maybe I won’t. But I have learned three things: to commit to loving myself no matter what, to take care of myself when I’m hurting, and, most importantly, to be grateful for my life-lessons and the teachers who make me face them.

Each adverse circumstance, in fact everything we experience as we trek through our personal soulscapes, can contribute to our soul’s growth. Conversely, if we don’t face our fears, move through our feelings, and befriend ourselves, each difficult person or circumstance can also contribute to emotional and spiritual atrophy. It’s up to us. We have the right to make our own choices.

What life-lessons decorate your soulscape? Who is especially talented at depositing lessons on your doorstep? What circumstances bring you face to face with that which you’d most like to avoid?

Becoming aware of, acknowledging, and accepting our life-lessons greatly facilitates learning them. As we accept and embrace the natural ebb and flow of our lives and feelings, we can revel in the splendor and power of high tide and discover the wonders revealed in the shallow pools at low tide. Exploring and healing our feelings, whether high or low, brings a treasure beyond belief: the treasure of authenticity.